My dear, beloved Thai girls,

I understand perfectly the reasons for which you decide to search for a farang to be your husband, friend or lover. Many of you look for a partner on internet sites. However you make so basic errors publishing your profiles that I feel that one day I’ll open a small business helping Thai women to present them online. It’s easy but you have to make a minimum effort to attain your aim. I’ll not enter into details here, I’ll write about 4 basic aspects of your online profiles. Just basics. Remember that online you can’t show your natural grace and femininity as you do in bars, massage centers, on the beaches. You have great country, full of fantastic women, but most of your online profiles are pitiful.

Four basic rules about publishing profiles: pictures, names, titles, and personal ads.

Online dating tips concerning pictures

Don’t do it or at least try to avoid:

• don’t publish blurry, vague pics
• don’t publish the last photo of you, put the best one
• but don’t use a pic taken 10 years ago neither, use a recent one
• don’t look sad, it’s about happiness and seducing a man
• don’t wear sunglasses
• be alone, don’t publish pics with children, other men or animals
• don’t take photos from your computer camera nor close-ups
• don’t use hearts or sweet backgrounds
• and absolutely don’t show that you are bandy-legged if your legs actually are bandy

Instead of these errors you have to or at least try to publish:

• more than 2 pictures
• smile and be seductive
• wear a traditional Thai sarong or a sexy modern dress, no jeans or shorts!
• publish at least one portrait of your face with visible eyes
• if you don’t know how to put on make-up go to a stylist
• chose a beautiful background for the photo, don’t do it on a car parking
• ask a graphic designer to help you with image editing

Think that you’re a star from Hollywood able to seduce every man you wish (which is a case of many of you in real). Men know you’re not a star but want to think that you actually are. Help him to think so. It’s not a lie, it’s just a game. Don’t be serious.

Online dating tips: names

To write a name should be unproblematic but apparently sometimes it is. Write in English, don’t write it in Thai because farangs will not understand it. Write your Thai name, not an English nick. If your name is Nong, write Nong, not Kate. Write it starting with big letter: Nong is correct, nong isn’t. Don’t put numbers after your name. Nong34 looks bad. You’re a person, not a number.

Online dating tips: titles of ads

Certainly pictures and personal ads are more important than names and titles but in most of the cases the title of your personal ad is the first thing your future love will read. Keep it short and write in correct English. Don’t use exclamation marks or smiles in the title; you can do it later in the ad body. There is the list of the words you should absolutely avoid in titles. Most of the women use it and it’s simply boring. There’s also no reason to write about obvious things. Remember also that you’re a woman, not a child. For these reason avoid in the title: love, alone, searching, look, heart, sweet, Mr. right, find, hello, waiting, guy, life, true. Be more original and personal. There’s an infinite quantity of other titles. Just avoid being like other women. You have to be unique, special, one of the million.

Online dating tips: personal ads

Dear girls, it’s bad, bad, bad! Very bad! Your English is so limited that it would be better if you don’t write anything. If you don’t speak English just write “Hi”.  The next problem is that apparently you write only about feelings. What about thoughts? Nothing at all? My advice to all of you: learn English and read books. Come back to publish your ads in 3 years. You won’t find anyone in this way. Ok, it’s time for a Thai massage. See you in the bar.